Moshe Zadka

Reminder: Main Blog moved

2010-09-13T21:44:07Z

Reminder: My main blog is in http://moshez.wordpress.com

My Ada Lovelace-inspired tribute to Emmy Noether

2010-03-24T21:11:54Z

On my blog -- http://moshez.wordpress.com/2010/03/24/ada-lovelace-day-remembering-emmy-noether/

Conflikt: Looking for a roommate

2009-12-01T20:46:19Z

More details

The Great F-list Purge

2009-11-29T03:54:05Z

Hi guys,

I am waaaaay too busy these days to read all my f-list, so I'm going to have to do some cut backs. When doing a mass-purge, it's possible to make mistakes. If I remove you by accident, just comment here, and I'll re-add you. If I removed you, and you care about it, assume it's by accident please.

ETA: Please note that the purge is done. If you are still my friends, you survived. If there are issues, let me know!

Digital Watches -- Removing the "pre" from the "announcement"

2008-12-14T13:41:14Z

Pico-Stories -> Digital Watces: http://picostory.com/?cat=3

Add it to your RSS feeds! (If you want to read my story)

Pre-Announcing "Digital Watches"

2008-12-01T19:42:31Z

See my blog

Also, for those of you who said you missed it: adding the pseudo-user for my blog as a friend will let you see my blog in your lj friends list (while conveniently not letting me read your locked posts -- for the one person who was concerned about this.)

VMware to Acquire B-hive: Personal FAQ (Link to WP blog)

2008-05-31T14:55:54Z

http://moshez.wordpress.com/2008/05/31/vmware-to-acquire-b-hive-a-personal-faq/

100 songs — and a booklet?

2008-04-16T20:28:50Z

X-posted to personal LJ, Israel filk LJ, wordpress blog

I am happy to announce I wrote my 100th song today. Now I have to keep a promise I made to myself, and to many friends. I am planning to take 20 of my songs, and put them in a booklet. It is partially for me, because I am sick of having to worry about electricity being available when I sing. It is partially for others who want to sing my songs. And it is partially just because I thought it would be cute.

The hidden agenda here is that the booklet, being a less malleable form than posts on a web page, needs the songs in a "finished form". I've been lazy, so far, with cleaning up scansion, rhyming and word choice. This will give me an incentive to clean up at least some of my songs, to make them each as good as they can be. What seems to be the problem then?

I need to choose the songs. I find it hard to do it on my own, so I invite my friends to help me. How can you help? Tell me which songs you like. Tell me which songs you hate. Tell me which songs you'd like if only I'd fix them so the 3rd line didn't suck so badly. Tell me which kinds of songs of mine you like. Etc.

This is a poll, not a vote -- I want to know what people think, not to count votes.

How can you contact me?

1. Mail -- moshez@divmod.com
2. Comments on this post

So let me know what you think.

All of my songs are published on http://filkmoshez.wordpress.com

RSS->LJ feed of my Wordpress blog

2008-03-21T15:06:54Z

Add this rss feed pseudo-user to your friends if you want to get my wordpress blog in your LJ friends group. Thanks to the anonymous soul who created it!

Public Announcement: Looking for help with music

2008-03-10T21:56:48Z

I hope that some people who actually know music are actually reading my blog. I am starting to want to write original songs, not just TTTOs. There is one simple tiny problem with that -- I lack education about music, and I suspect I lack some talent in that area. On my part, I have consulted with some musicians I respect, and I am going to start to try writing melodies. If you feel like helping with any part of writing music, including help with melodies, writing melodies, arranging or writing the accompaniments, please get in touch with me.

If you wonder this would be a good fit for your music, The Alpha Beta Song and Cephalopods show examples of the kind of stuff I do. They still have scansion issues, and I'm willing to adapt rhyme/meter to fit a melody if needs be.

To clarify: I'm asking for either fish, pole or both.

Filking Strong

2008-03-01T17:48:26Z

I usually don't post here much, as I've mentioned, but I just want to publicise some of my newest filk songs.

All the songs mentioned can be found at my filk blog.

"Filker in the Con" is a parody of "Creature in the Wood", written after I realized that the line "my song can drive a man insane" needs a new song written around it. "Patience of a Programmer", TTTO of "Temper of Revenge", was written after in my haste to quickly check-in a trivial bug fix, away from my desk, I went "just give me a prompt" to the world. "Eaten by Zombies is good" was written when I wanted to make a mashup of Zombie and Pirate songs. "Dragons" was written because I knew "Tribbles" has to have a parody inside it looking to get out. "Operation:Bug storm" is an idea I had like a year ago to emphasise how software engineers are the biggest victims of Murphy. "Never Set Tom Cruise on Fire" was written in honor of the int'l day of protesting against scientology, since I was NOT going to drive into the parts of Tel-Aviv I never set foot in just to protest. "If I Had a Brother" -- just a random wish to "write a story from the PoV of the villain" together with how much it "If I had a boat" stuck in my head. "Graveling" was born when I decided I need a Heather Alexander parody, I realized I love "Samhain" and I suddenly spotted the DLM DVDs on my TV stand. "A vorpal sword" was written because I wanted to do a beatles parody, "Norwegian Wood" came to me and the rest just followed logically. "We're Fighting Men" was written after Chen commented that she hoped for a Starship Troopers song, I wanted to do a Hair parody, and the whole '60s "Vietnam vs. Hippies" theme was just irresistable.

"Hacker" came because I was all down with musicals, I love "Little Shop of Horrors" and I thought it would turn out cute. "Cow's Song"...what can I say about it? I was "while :;do fortune;read;clear;done"ing and saw the purple cow and the "Ah yes, I wrote the purple cow" reprise, and that day Eli Goldberg posted a link to another performance of "Mal's Song"...at the part where I remembered the scene with the cow fetus/alien, I knew I had no choice. Supersmurfette came out of a silly discussion on filkhaven regarding smurfs and my RHPS fandom. "People Don't Do These Things" came from having the original stuck in hand after Dana gave a good performance at the filksing. "Sorceress Maid" -- I started singing "Oh, I am a programmer, code flows from my fingers," and then started to write "Programmer Lass", but in the middle of it, I ended up hating it, and then realizing that I hated it because it didn't need programmers. "To Space" was just an exercise in editing -- the basic parody was done a while ago, but the song is kinda repetitive, and it had to wait until I drunkenly pulled out the laptop at the BART station waiting for the Millbrae train to finish it.

New blog: moshez.wordpress

2007-12-10T13:59:08Z

So! Here is a public announcement.

I am moving my main blogging to http://moshez.wordpress.com

Sorry. It was fun while it lasted, but the SUP insanity seems insane indeed, and I am jumping ship before it gets *too* crazy.

I am keeping my account, and will keep on reading my friends' LJ.

Parkour vol. 2: the adventure continues

2007-12-09T19:34:54Z

So, I am continuing on my voyage to become a traceur. Today's workout was shorter than tommorow's: my body is letting me know this is too much stress. Tommorow will be Moshe'Z official "day off", with no running. I think I need to rest...but nonetheless it was fun, and I discovered many cool places around to Parkour in. I am still taking it easy with the obstacles, only clearing the occasional one for fun and profit. I learned how to run up a short steep slope, how to to a "equilibre" and stuff like that -- and of course practiced my rolls more. This is fun!

Running by the woods in the cold evening

2007-12-08T18:42:20Z

The art is lovely, harsh and deep
But I have obstacles to leap
And rails to jump to go before I sleep,
And rails to jump to go before I sleep,

(with apologies to Robert Frost)

Do you know what Parkour is? Go read the wikipedia entry on Parkour. I'll wait, take your time. I did not know either, until today. Well, some comment thrown a while ago by adrianna_r that led to some googling and youtubing on someone else's computer while I watched over his shoulder. Nothing serious. Then today, as I was wondering what I could find if I just let myself wonder around YouTube aimlessly looking for "cool stuff", I found it again. It was nice. This time, it was my own computer so I could google and wikipedia. It sounded awesome. I wondered "how hard is it really," which led to looking at some how-to pages. Suddenly, I realized I was reading this as if I was going to do this -- actually do it. Of course, people being what they are, herenot tried to discourage me. Hah!

I put on my running shoes, and decided to start with something easy -- just run, if I see an easy obstacle -- I'll clear it, and see how it goes. OK, so you know how I'm out of shape? Like, for serious. I am *out of shape*. After five minutes of running, I was breathing hard. Clearing obstacles -- not my main problem. OK, so I need to get in shape. I tried walk/run for a while, seeing how hard that is, trying to get in shape. That, I could do, at least get the blood pumping and the heart used to pumping it through my body. After another ten minutes of this, I was too tired -- but I saw grass. The perfect place to try some Parkour rolls. So I did. They hurt, of course, because my technique -- kinda crappy. But I managed to do like seven of those before giving up, and walking home, still trying to pump it up. That was fun. I think I am going to get in shape by trying to go for a run when I go home, then try some Parkour rolls, see how it goes. Eventually I'll start practicing my landings, which will look silly, and rolls on concret, which will be painful.

I have started on a strange and atypical, for me, journey. Wish me luck -- and rest assured, I will try and update it.

And yes, I am happy to try to learn to play the harmonica, write songs, write and edit novels and do Parkour in addition to my job. A life unfilled with way too much awesome stuff is, I am quite certain, a life not worth living.

Algorithm March! With Ninjas!

2007-12-08T14:48:19Z

Did everyone see this and forgot to tell me?

Buying ebooks

2007-12-01T19:18:51Z

I live in Israel. Like the rest of Europe, it is beyond the Atlantic ocean from the United States. Therefore, shipping costs to Israel are astronomical -- buying a few books often means shelling 20% on shipment for *SLOW* shipment. With fast, it can easily reach daylight-robbery levels. This is annoying, because like all people, I like my goddamn satisfaction here and now. Bookstores are not open on Saturday (except one, which is far away and suckular), and close on 15:00-17:00 on Friday. This means buying books is an ordeal. Ordering online is too expensive and slow. Going to a bookstore is a project needing advance planning. Today, I was sitting at home (parents' place, actually, just before driving off to mine, but that's neither here nor there) when I was browsing on Holly Lisle's site, and saw some interesting books about writing. The physical version costs twice as much, then further exasberated by a shipping cost that is way too high and by having to wait for a few days (best case scenario). The electronic version? Well, let's just say I pulled out my wallet, and 30 minutes later (downloading them all plus the various freebies took time and I was doing stuff in the middle of it all) I had them all, backed up to the places I usually back up things. Holly Lisle, thank the lords, is not one of the DRM fascists, so I can actually read the books on an Ubuntu laptop which is not the laptop I bought it from.

And just like that, I get to read them everywhere.

Yes, yes, I know, I cannot curl up with them (although a laptop works just as well in bed -- so I can read it until a couple of minutes I fall asleep). I cannot throw them if they're stupid. And so on and so forth, irrelevancies as opposed to the fact that I can read them. Right. Now. As soon as I finish posting this...

The Feeling of Goodness About My Person

2007-11-25T01:37:50Z

I feel good about myself. First year NaNo, not only I won (I knew I would win when I learned I can do 1800 words an hour), and not only did I win by a margin (after you win, it does not really matter -- you've written a novel, you know you can do it) but most importantly, I give useful advice to people: http://www.nanowrimo.org/eng/node/1067928 and yes, I did enjoy the "Moshez, you're my hero" posts, why are you asking?

This is why it's fun. You get wonderful advice, you give advice, and together, a bunch of people make it over the finish line, to where they are holding a novel in their hands, having pulled each other to success.

Novel ideas

2007-11-24T17:54:15Z

They say that novel ideas are a dime a dozen. They are completely right. There are a gazillion. Through writing, I've thought of several -- Night of the Loving Dead (necrophiliac and zombie save the world from an evil necromancer), National Crime Writing Month (a NaNoveller is using the forums for ideas to commit unsolvable crimes) and It Takes Character (a teenager immersed in virtual worlds finds that his character has become real -- or has it?) This is after through the month I had ideas for three novels because I finished the previous one (Best Left Evil, Home Guard and Space Debris). I am not sure. Perhaps writing good novels is hard -- I still have to see if I can get mine to be good. But writing novels? It is easy. You get idea (of which there are zillions), you sit down for a month, spending just an hour each day to write 2K words, at the end -- voila -- 60K words of draft. This is assuming you have a full time job, and can only devote one hour to writing per day...You know, if people told me it was this easy, I might have tried it sooner.

What is the deal, people? Why are you not all writing novels? Next year, I am getting as many people as I can to NaNoWriMo with me...

NaNoWriMo experiences: an interim summary

2007-11-17T22:05:56Z

I have finished my 3rd and "officially last" NaNo novel today. I am starting to work on a novel called Space Debris which is pseudo-NaNovel: I am going to include it in my word count (via the old familiar trick of "then he read a novel which went like this") and I'm going to attempt 2K a day but I mostly started it in November so I won't stop be a part of the experience, even if I now have to take it much less seriously.

Amazing. If nothing else, even if my novels are not worth crap after all the editing in the world, it doesn't matter. I now know that I *can* design a plot to fit 50K (or probably more), that I *can* force myself to write when I want to, that I *can* write through any writer block by just accepting that it will be a little crappy and fixed later. I found that when I want to go as fast as I can, I can whip out 1K words in 15 minutes (later needing cleanup, perhaps, but nonetheless...). I found that I can solve plot holes and plot problems for others -- and that I can ask for help with mine. I found that I can work from an outline, and go off of it when I feel like it. It was a pretty amazing experience, and I am much the richer for that.

Where does it leave me?
* I am working on Space Debris. I am experimenting with a new technique explained by Lizette Gifford in her book "NaNo for the New and the Insane": really detailed outline. I did a chapter level outline. Then I did scene-level outline. Now I am doing a "sub-scene" level outline, detailing each 100 words. I am half-way through doing it after two straight hours of working on it.
* I will edit my Novels come December
* I found I am interested in writing enough to take this further.
* Next year, my NaNo goal will be one novel of 150K words. I knew I can do the words -- can I do a 150K novel? I plan to outline it to 100-word level before November [as explicitly allowed in the rules] then just write through it.

NaNoWriMo novel 3: Home Guard

2007-11-12T01:09:50Z

You know the deal. Spoilers within.

Home Guard
==========

Tagline: When a house-sitter finds he became the gatekeeper between our
world and others, a mistake causes him to need to search for a lost hero
-- in all the wrong places.

Prologue:
In another universe, far far away

Chapter 1:
Coming to house sit. First thing smells fishy.

Chapter 2:
First people pass: first man asks to "use his bathroom". He allows him.
Then he finds the bathroom is empty. Then people arrive from the bathroom,
but cannot leave until he grants permission. Leaves message.

Chapter 3:
More people enter. He stops caring, gives permission left and right

Chapter 4:
Rules are there. Finds out about his mistake
Chapter 5:
Despondent, searches everywhere with no help

Chapter 6:
Asks his friends for help. They do research

Chapter 7:
Romp through plane #1

Chapter 8:
Romp through plane #2, seeing clue

Chapter 9:
Romp through plane #3, finding hero

Chapter 10:
Returning with hero

Chapter 11:
Vanquishing the villain

Chapter 12:
Convincing the hero to return home

Epilogue:
In a land far away, the hero chases the villain

Prologue:
 1 Another universe -- scenery
 2 Chase (+ hunter/hunted)
 3 A room in the middle of it
 4 Chase ends, the room stops one but not the other
Chapter 1
 1 Meet Mike who lives with parents
 2 Meet Jennifer and Paul, who are going to europe
 3 Jennifer and Paul offer Mike the house
 4 Mike is hesitant, never lived out of the house
 5 Mike's mother practically drives him away
 6 Jennifer and Paul show Mike around the house, assuage his fears
 7 Mike moves in, learns to live on his own
 8 Mike buys groceries for first time
 9 Mike invites friends for a house warming party
10 Someone whom he is not sure arrives, comes in anyway 
11 Later, he cannot recall the man ever coming out
Chapter 2
 1 Morning after the party, cleaning up
 2 First person comes, asks to use the bathroom. Mike realises he used the
   wrong one.
 3 Mike realises he hasn't come out. Searches the house
 4 Searches the bathroom carefully -- it is empty
 5 As he leaves, he notices someone arriving
 6 Description of the someone -- otherworldly.
 7 The someone asks permission, explains about the gate
 8 Mikes leaves a frantic message
 9 More people enter, ask to use the bathroom. Mike agrees
Chapter 3:
 1 People arrive at all hours
 2 Mike puts up "only open between" signs
 3 Mike leaves another frantic message
 4 Mike is too tired to care. He just gives everyone permission
 5 Descriptions of people who enter
 6 Descriptions of people who leave
 7 Meet Sue and Mike. He does not tell her.
 8 John arrives to pick up Sue
Chapter 4:
 1 Another man comes in, Mike lets him
 2 News the next day about someone similar suspected of homicide
 3 Mike feels guilty
 4 Mike calls up Sue, asks a hypothetical question
 5 Another man comes in, explains he is chasing the man suspected of homicide.
 6 Mike learns of the rules
 7 Another man comes in, tells Mike he has let in a danger
 8 Mike leaves another frantic message on machine
Chapter 5:
 1 Mike feels he cannot talk to anyone
 2 Mike shows up at his parents' but they are no help
 3 Mike stops allowing people to pass
 4 Mike learns that he is responsible for a death
 5 Mike decides to question people
 6 Mike learns what the danger is
 7 Mike gets a book explaining how to stop the danger
 8 Mike fails on his own
Chapter 6:
 1 Mike calls Sue. She does not believe him
 2 Mike convinces Sue
 3 Sue convinces John
 4 Sue and John convince Lane
 5 Lane and Mike talk
 6 Mike crushes on Lane
 7 Together they research
 8 They devise a strategy
Chapter 7:
 1 Passing through the gate
 2 Asking for permission
 3 Undergoing trial #1
 4 Undergoing trial #2
 5 Undergoing trial #3
 6 Finding out they bet wrong
 7 Going back
 8 Devising another strategy
Chapter 8:
 1 Passing through the gate
 2 Asking for permission
 3 Making sacrifice
 4 Figuring their way around
 5 Finding clue
 6 Overcoming danger
 7 Going back
 8 Figuring out clue
Chapter 9:
 1 Passing throuhg the gate
 2 Asking for permission
 3 Denied permission!
 4 Passing through the gate
 5 Asking for permission
 6 Asked a riddle
 7 The right answer is "this is too cliche"
 8 Starting to look for hero
Chapter 10
 1 Finding way to hero
 2 Finding hero
 3 Convincing hero they are worthwhile
 4 On way back, hero and Mike fight
 5 Overcoming danger
 6 Coming back
 7 Figuring out how to disguise hero
 8 Perparing for tommorow
Chapter 11
 1 Preparing to go out
 2 Mike comes on to Lane, she weasels out
 3 Going out
 4 Mike comes on to Lane, she tells him she is in a commited relationship
 5 Mike pressures Lane, she explains about bi-sexuality
 6 Mike doesn't believe, asks Sue
 7 Mike walks away in anger, betrayed
 8 Hero asks what happened?
Chapter 12:
 1 Following danger
 2 Getting close, realising it is hard
 3 Mike returns with a creature -- cavalry!
 4 Chasing the danger
 5 Danger is looming close!!
 6 Big fight -- the beginning
 7 Big fight -- almost lose
 8 Big fight -- the heroics and the win
Epilogue:
 1 Another universe
 2 Hero chases villain
 3 Mike, what are you doing in the other universe?
 4 Last message Mike left

NaNoWriMo novel 2: Best Left Evil

2007-11-06T01:13:33Z

Outline, partial detailed outline. Don't click if you don't want spoilers for my novel!

Best Left Evil
==============

Tagline: Where good reigns supreme, the only way to be free is to be evil.

In a world where the tyrannical ruler is ensuring the goodness of all his
man using powerful enchantments and strict enforcement, a movement for
the return of evil to the world is the only chance for freedom.

Plot summary: A man is carted off to a re-education camp for punching.
He rises through the rank of a secret movement that has evil as its
goals, as the new leader of the movement carries more and more weight.
Eventually, the leader wins, but is EVIL. The man betrays him, restoring
balance.

Prologue: 
A man carted off to the re-education camp for punching another. He returns,
a changed man, calmer, more benevolent. At night, he cries himself to sleep.

Chapter 1:
Five years later, that man is training to be evil again. We learn that
he is part of a movement, and we learn the identities of some of the members,
as well as the exposition.

Chapter 2:
A global movement seeking a leader. Qualifications: must be evil. All over
the world, the movement is organizing, attempting to find the vilest to lead
it.

Chapter 3:
The man is entering the contest. He fails supremely, after many others.

Chapter 4:
A leader is found. A man so vile, so manipulative, he managed to escape
from the re-education camp.

Chapter 5:
The man joins the local chapter, training in earnest.

Chapter 6:
The leader begins planning, mobilizing his forces.

Chapter 7:
The man is marching, happy to be fighting for the cause

Chapter 7:
The leader begins conquering more and more lands.

Chapter 8: 
The man is rising through the ranks, doing great in the cause of evil.

Chapter 9:
The tables turn: the movement is sorely hurt.

Chapter 10:
The man brings the tide about, helping to save the day.

Chapter 11:
The big victory

Chapter 12:
Broken from within: the man ousts the leader, dismantles the movement,
and lets a new form rise from the anarchy.

Epilogue

Characters:
 * Good leader
 * Evil leader
 * Main character
 * Main character friends
   * Friend from old days
   * Trainer in evil
   * Magician friend
   * Love interest

Detailed outline:
 * Prologue: 
   1 A fight over nothing, a punch
   2 Being arrested 
   3 Returning a changed man
   4 Crying at nigt
 * Chapter 1
   1 Establish five years later, day in life
   2 Establish movement for evil
   3 Man training to be evil
   4 Man contemplating ideology
   5 Friend from old days visits
   6 A day in a good society
   7 A stranger carted off
   8 Meet the magician
 * Chapter 2
   1 A meeting of the local chapter -- seeking leader
   2 Meetings all over the world
   3 Failed candidate 1
   4 Failed candidate 2
   5 MC decides he is qualified
   6 MC prepares for the trial
   7 MC enters
   8 MC learns that nobody who has been re-educated stands a chance

NaNoWriMo: on methodology

2007-11-02T06:08:31Z

I have a rough outline, already posted. I always keep the non-written part of the current chapter's outline in the file I'm editing. Every editing session begins with a new file, with the naming convention of day-of-month.file-in-day.txt, both numbers padded out to two digits so that they will sort correctly. When I close out an editing session, I put the parts of the outline that are yet to be written in the next file, so I always start form a non-blank file, which is important for morale, but I never have to see what I've written, so I have no temptation to edit. Of course, I use nvi as my editor.

So far I only word-warred once (I came out second out of three with 650 words/15 minutes) and I did it using cat > newfile.txt,
with the intention of moving it to a correctly numbered file. That worked wonderfully for writing speed, which increased by
20-30% with this method, allowing me only one line of edits and then it gets commited. The word-war bit was about a religion
mac vs. ubuntu war, that will probably get cleaned up and moved to somewhere else in the novel in the future, but so far it
gained me 650 words towards my goal.

Each time, before I update my word count on nanowrimo, I zip all my files and mail them to myself on Yahoo!. This qualifies
as my backup for the day. Yahoo!'s no limit on mail means I don't care if I fill it up with mostly-duplicate zips. I add
writing buddies who have close, but hopefully above, my word count, so I will get inspired to outdo them. I added one particular
gem: this person always writes two thousands words above me when I sleep, so this ensures my 2K words for the day effortlessly.
I have one buddy with almost twice my count -- this is so I will have actual stars to strive for.

NaNoWriMo is up

2007-10-31T23:17:28Z

It's 1:16am localtime here, and I'm 2330 words into nanowrimo.
Not as good as I hoped, as I wanted to have 5000 done before morning, but better than strictly necessary.

NaNoWriMo writing exercise

2007-10-30T19:18:02Z

I wanted to know how fast I could get words out -- this stuff matters for NaNoWriMo. So I took a silly idea I found in the threads about the whole story being told with interruptions and retellings, and tried to make a story out of nothing but that. Note, as per nanowrimo advice, I did not edit worth for shit. The drivel that follows may be unreadable. But it's ~850 words, and it's been done in roughly 25 minutes. That's a good pace, it means I might have a chance to do 2K w/h.

NaNoWriMo test -- a silly short story
=====================================

So, we were right there in front of the dragon. Just me, my buddy
Tom and the weird guy hardly anyone knew.

"Wait"
"What?"
"Didn't you also have that swordman with you?"
"Oh, yes, you're right."

So we were right there. Me, my buddy Tom, the weird guy hardly anyone
knew and John the swordman. He was the newest one to join us, after
that silly debacle we had --

"Hah, a debacle? I heard you went and..."
"Not now. Seriously, let me tell the goddamn story."

Yeah, John was the newest to the party, but not the newest to swordmanship.
He could really kick ass. The dragon was cooped up in his cave, luckily
for us, so we could hide behind a crack and plan our attack.

"You said you were right in front of the dragon, didn't you?"
"Well, I meant in the metaphorical sense."

We were hiding behind the crack in the cave, listening to the dragon
snoring, just me, my buddy Tom, the weird guy hardly anyone knew and
John the swordman. Suddenly there is quiet all around. It takes us
a while to realize what's wrong -- the goddamn snoring is gone.
The dragon is awake.

"Wait, do dragons really snore?"
"Yes, they do."

"Who's there?" the dragon rumbled. We tried to make ourselves as tiny
as we could while the weird guy hardly anyone knew suddenly up and went
"It's just us." If looks could kill, we'd have to resurrect him.
But the weird guy just put his finger to his lips, signs that we should
stay where we are and goes to confront the dragon.

"Do I know you?" said the dragon.
"I don't think so," said the weird guy.
"Give me a reason I shouldn't just kill you now?"
"Well...you could guess a reason. Do you think I'm stupid enough to just
be standing here without an ace up my sleeve?"
"Hrm..."

And just like that, the guy takes like a maniac to the far side of the cave,
with the dragon's moment of hesitation being just enough to give him time
to hide behind that big rock in the corner. He starts chanting like he's
casting a spell or something. The dragon's breathing fire, but the rock
was in a lucky spot, and this guy really knew how to hide.

"But dragon fire melts rock."
"Oh, right, it wasn't a rock, it was this big magical statue of a dragon.
Heavens know how it got into the cave."

So the weird guy hardly anyone knew is chanting from behind the dragon
statue, when we suddenly start listening to him, "ttackay ethay ragonday
romfay hindbeay", and we realize it's freakin' pig-latin telling us
that he has the dragon pre-occupied and we should attack him from behind.

I let loose a volley of arrows at the dragon, as John started hacking
at his ankles and Tom started casting actual spells at him. By the
time the dragon noticed us, he was pretty much out of fire, and we managed
to get enough attacks in to give us a fighting chance, when suddenly we
notice the weird guy not being there any more. Well, let me tell you,
in the middle of a fight, you dont' wait for no weird guy to bail you
out. We were pretty much beaten and bruised, but the dragon was eventually
finished. We started looking for the weird guy but he was no longer
to be found. Also nowhere to be found was the collection of magical
rings the dragon had. We've been swindled! This guy didn't try to
distract the dragon so that we'll win -- he distracted us so that
he can steal the rings.

You can imagine how pissed we were. This guy had risked all our necks,
and stole our loot. So we started looking closer, and we saw that right
behind the dragon statue was an exit from the cave.

"But you said the cave only had one exit!"
"Well, we thought that when we got in, too..."

So, we're out the rings, but we have this whole rest of the dragon
treasure to carry. We started carrying it to the horses we left outside
when we see that -- lo and behold -- the weird guy set them all loose
to further distract us. Fun guy, that. Anyhow, we spent the whole
day gathering the animals and loading them up. When we finished carting
the whole thing to the town, who do we see there if not the weird
guy just looking at us? Well, anyone else, that's who, 'cause we sure
as hell didn't see the weird guy.

So, after a while, we start getting more and more pisssed. We went back
to the cave, and started to search for the weird guy's tracks, when suddenly
we heard a noise from the bushes.

Found in Space -- an old short story of mine

2007-10-30T15:14:13Z

Before LJ, my journal was the moshez.org mailing list, now long gone. I managed to rescue this old story.

Found in Space
--------------

Sam was finishing up his work on the hydroponics, and was whistling as he
walked away. His whistling was not solely due to the end of his shift at
the hydroponics garden, though with the smell of the fertilizer bad as it
was, it would have been enough. But to top it all off, Sam was planning
to see Jane from US14 in a little while. What with the school year
almost finished and the maintainance work that had to be done, he didn't see
her for almost a month now.

A short trip home in zero-gravity was just the thing he needed to work off
some of the andreanline that has been building up, he decided.
US27Sp was one of the more advanced settlments, and had the zero-gravity
tube, now common, going through it. Sam got in the elevetor, and floated home,
thinking. About Jane, about the embargo, in a dreamy haze.

"I'm going to Jane's, mom", Sam called as he rushed out of his room with
his space suit, "I won't be late". He knew he shouldn't give her time to
object -- Sam's mother, Hellen, was an earthy, and she never got used to
the ease and safety of through-space travel. "Sam, you be careful" was all
she managed to get in. He hoped none of his friends
were at the air lock just now, facing their taunts was beyond him. Luckily,
the airlock was deserted. Sam got into his spacesuit quickly, and set up
the man-cannon.

Sam was cruising through space at 200 km/h. He dialed Jane's number.
"Jane? I'm gonna be there in about half an hour. I miss you too. Bye"
Sam turned on the music player, and started on his homework on the
on-suit computer. His weak attempts of concentrating on newtonian
mechanics were mercifully ended by the warning light.
Sam was going to miss US14 by a kilometer. He released some of the compressed
air from his on-suit motors, and corrected the course, setting himself
into a spin. A more gentle application of the motors, and he was going
feet first into the colony.

Sam started the electrifying procedure.
When arriving at a colony, there was no need, and little ability, to use
the motors to stop. You just electrified your suit, and let the charged
port do the hard work of stopping you. While stopping through 100 meters
from a 200 km/h sounds painful, the only problem was that it was all
Sam could do not to get sick. The suit was more accomodating than the
best seat-belts, and all in all, it was a pretty comfortable way to travel.

Sam visibly relaxed when he saw the lettering on the colony:
"US14 -- New California". It was all automatic from here.
For some reason Sam could not understand, the earth-built colonies always
had those earth-bound names. He had all of ten seconds to contemplate
on that, going at neck breaking speed towards the colony.

Jane started the trip towards the airlock, when she heard Sam call.
Sam was busy for so long, and so was she. She started roller-blading
across the smooth outside window, feeling as though she was gliding
on space itself, with the stars rushing diagonally backwards beneath
her feet. She came to a grinding stop at the airlock elevator and went
up.

The airlock operator was vaguely familiar -- he was a friend of her
father's.

"Come in. You're Jane, aren't you?"
"Yes"
"You're waiting for that nice young man?" he asked, pointing at the
rapidly approaching form of what was probably Sam.
Jane blushed deeply and looked at her shoes.

Sam arrived at the north end. By convention, all space stations
rotate from west to east. He felt the electrical charge stopping
him like a giant foot crushing him for all of a second...and he
bumped lightly into the space station. Sam was somewhat off-center, but the
hand holds provided an easy way to get to the airlock. He pressed the entry
button and the airlock opened automatically. Of course, Sam knew some human
had to actually open it but he also knew the human's reaction
was probably just as automatic as the machine's. There were no burglars
in space. Sam got in, and took off his helmet. He liked the US14 smell,
and wished US10 got to grow flowers too.

Hugging a man in a spacesuit is somewhat problematic, and is harder still
in zero gravity. Jane wrapped her
arms around Sam as far as they could go, which was not much. "Hi Jane",
Sam said as he returned the awkward hug. He got out of the space suit,
and turned to the elevator. He always had a slight dislike of the ride
downwards, when he felt his weight slowly increasing, until weightlessness
seemed like a dream.

"I really missed you.", said Jane.
"I missed you too, but you know, with the embargo and all, we have to work
extra hard"
"I know"

The space embargo has been in effect for a few months now, and it was shaping
up to be quite annoying. The United States goverment has declared there will
be no shipments to L5 until the colonists will build only SPSes.
The colonists, who had their hands full building more space colonies and
were already feeling the space constraints, refused. They had the necessities
of life in the colonies, but luxuries were still imported from earth.

Jane lived towards the south of US14a, which was a few hundred meters of walk.
They walked towards her place slowly, hand in hand.
When Sam and Jane have been about half way to Jane's, they heard a commotion
from one of the common rooms. People have been squeezing to get in and it
has been packed full.

"What's up?" Jane asked someone.
"There are news from Earth"

The face on the big TV screen was the US president's. "...I regret to say
I found I have to send the military to restore order to the space colonies..."
Sam could take it no more, he turned his back and left, Jane rushing after
him. "Sam, Sam. You're not going to do anything stupid, are you?"
"I just can't take it. Let's go to your place."

Later: "They can't win, you know."
"Who?"
"The earthies."
"Sam, you can't fight them. They'll...they'll...have weapons."
"They don't know space. We do."
"You are going to do something stupid."
"Let's go look at the stars."

Since the dawn of humanity, humans have looked up to the stars. Sam and
Jane looked down on them. Hand in hand, as they were lying on the transparent
floor, they saw the stars moving below them. Sam felt he could lie like
this for hours and hours. Sam woke up, and looked at his watch. Predictably
he was late. "Jane, wake up. I've gotta go".

Sam was back at the hydroponics garden inside an hour, not noticably late.
He was working with Al. "You heard the news?", asked Al.
"Yah", he muttered, "they have no right to do it."
"Cheer up, man. They said they're going only after the earth-built colonies."
"Jane is in an earth-built colony."
"Right, Jane."
"You realize they'll take us over next?"
Al shrugged, "What do you want us to do?"
"Take over"

Alarms were squealing in US14. Major Hardy woke up from an uneasy sleep.
Major Hardy (Dan, to his few friends) hated space. He hated having nothing
between him and vacum except for a bit of steel. He hated the uncanny
feeling of looking up and feeling the world is going to topple on him.
In short, Major Hardy missed good old earth. The same Major Hardy who
had every premonition about space become true when the soldier on duty
reported, amidst the alarms and flashing lights, that a hull breached
occured.

"What do you mean, a hull breach?", yelled Major Hardy, "the scientists
claimed it was supposed to occur only once every million years. Get all
men to the hull breach! Pronto!". The Major's hair was a mess, his
eyes were red, and he already had trouble breathing in the thinning
atmosphere. Then, another soldier came in to report.

"Sir, it appears we have another hull breach -- in b section."
"Damn b section to all hells"

The Major's men did not have much experience with repair, but he dared
not trust the rebels with it -- not yet. In the hours it took the marines
to fix a breach that any space-born could have fixed in half an hour,
fifty young people from US27Sp, US28Sp and US29Sp crept in silently
through the man sized hole they made through section b of US14, and
neatly closed it after them. They counted on the Major panicking from
a hull breach in his section to give them enough time to get inside
the station. By the time the Major conducted an investigation and
found out the breach was not made by a meteorite, they would be
on their way back.

Section b, they knew, was where the SPSes components were stored. It
seemed a shame to do what they were going to. Oh, well. Within hours,
all the components were floating in space. By the time Major Hardy
was discovering that US14 suddenly had no available components for
building SPS and that, basically, the next shift of builders had
nothing to do, he was getting reports from all the other stations.
No other station had any SPS components on board, and L5 had them
floating in it.

Sam knew Jane was not going to like it. She was born on earth, and was
still thinking like an earthy. Earthies always think the guy giving orders
is somehow all powerful. They are always forgetting there are two sides
to an order: the guy giving it and the guy receiving it. Both sides are
equally necessary. In any case, the ball was in the other team's part.
All Sam had to do was wait. For word from Jane. For the reaction of the
military. Anything.

One reaction came soon enough. One was a long time coming. As always,
the one he dreaded more came first. They got the word less than two
days later. The military was going to take over the space-built stations
too. They had a week to surrender, and then they will be invaded. The
ruse was obvious to Sam -- NASA needed the week to train enough soldiers
for space, and prepare the launch. Sam and his friends spent the week
preparing.

The week went by fast. By the week's end, the atmosphere in US27Sp
was thick with tension. Sam was right next to the dock operator.

"This is the US shuttle 'The Lincoln'. Prepare for docking" The message
came over the radio, loud and clear.
"We are sorry we are unable to comply with your request, but unfortunately
our docking equipment is damaged."

The Lincoln, having prepared for this eventuality, has docked at the US9,
which had perfectly usable docking equipment, the marines having guarded
it from potential saboteurs.

Back on earth, the Secretary of Space was having an interview in CNN.

"Hello, George. Nice to have you with us."
"Hi, Kevin, it's good to be here."
"We understood that you're sending troops to force the colonies
to work on the SPSes?"
"The issue is not forcing. The issue is that the United States of America
is counting ont he Solar Power Stations to supply much needed energy. We
sent those people into space for a job, and they spit in our eye. We
must not let them steal those space stations from the American public."

Jane was in her room, sulking. She knew Sam would do something stupid.
Like throwing the SPS parts in US14 to space. Or knocking off parts of the
dock station on US27Sp. He was just being silly. She remembered how
he came to visit her on the night of the "Space Tea Party", as it
was to be known later. She was besides herself with fury. But now
she missed him. The radio-phone still worked. Jane dialed Sam.

An almost unheard, shy "Hi."
"I thought you didn't want to speak to me again."
"I thought so too."
"I miss you."
"I do to. Come here."
"I can't."
"Sure you can. Nobody is guarding the airlock in section b, right?"

"I missed you so much!", said Sam. Now, it was Jane's turn to hug
him awkwardly, still wearing a space suit.
"I missed you too."
It is hard, though possible, to kiss someone wearing a space suit.
When the kissing subsided, Sam asked Jane,
"You remember when you just got here?"

Jane did.
It was five years ago, when she was 12. She was surprised to hear both
her parents got their dream jobs. She was shocked to hear where they
are relocating to. She decided she won't go. Her mother had a talk
with her.

"Why don't you want to go?"
"There's no air there."
"There's air enough in the colony."
"What if a meteor comes?"
"That is likely to happen once in a thousand lifetimes. And even ifit
does, it takes a week for the colony to depressurize."
Jane sulked, which generally seemed like a good way to close arguments.

When she just got on the colony, she was deathly afraid of everything.
Then she met thirteen year old Sam. They were together in Zero-Gravity
Gymnastics class. Jane's mother made her take it to cure her of her
phobias. Sam's parents made him take it to keep him out of trouble.
They both hated it with passion, and they both met each other hiding
in the back. Sam hanged upside down of her. On purpose.

"You're still that crazy kid.", she said.
"I can still get you to do crazy things. Race you to the 0-g room."

"So, what are we going to do now?"
"We should phone my mother. She must be going insane."

Space is a cold, dark place. Especially for a newcomer. Sergeant
Gant was a newcomer. He hated space. And he felt space hated him
right back. If there was one thing he hated more than being on a spaceship,
it was being in a space suit, floating through space. Sergeant Gant,
however, had a mission. He would see to it that him and his men would
see it through. So, he was heading at 100 km/h, along with ten of his
men, towards US27Sp.

"Sam, please don't go there."
"Please don't come with me."
"If you go, I go."

They were hiding in the space between the cylinders, with some friends.
They weren't sure yet how the marines were planning to get in, but
they were planning to stop them. The site of the two cylinders going
in opposite directions was somewhat unnerving, and was already starting
to make them dizzy.

The marines were headed towards the other end of US27bSp -- the supplies
cylinder. They had to beat them there. Wordlessly, they jumped into space,
turned their motors on and hurtled the kilometer towards the other end
of the b cylinder. Sam, Jane and a couple of the others got to the
end of section b just a few minutes before the marines. If it wasn't
that serious, it would have been funny.

When Sam said the marines didn't know space, he didn't know how right
he was. As soon as they sighted resistance, they fell into the common
procedure of taking cover. But there is no cover in space, and stopping
is a delicate procedure which is liable to leave the untrained flier
turning about himself. Before the marines had realized that, some young
people who have been flying through space whenever they could had disarmed
them, and were heading back to section b's airlock. The marines had
just enough presence of mind to retreat to US9.

Jane was in her space suit, doing 500 km/h. She'd be in SP209 in a few
minutes. "Grandma Jane? Yes, I'll be there in a few." Jane loved to hear
Grandma Jane talk about the old days. Things must have been so primitive
and exciting.

"Hi, dear, come right in. We just got a shipment of Belgian chocolate".

With the price of energy going up, and the SPSes providing over 80% of
the earth's energy needs, Belgian chocolate stopped being a rare luxury --
but it was still Jane's favourite.